The meaning of life

The dementors have closed in on me, but they are standing at a distance as there is a abyss between us; an abyss that has saved my soul, a soul that has been drained of all happiness, a soul that has lost its essence. And I feel bereft, I feel helpless, I feel lost and confused, for I believed that joy was the reason for existence, but I have been robbed of that very reason. The dementors are polymorphic tools of destruction, they can take on any form and shape. They will instill fear in your hearts, whether it is fear for your loved ones, or fear for your own life, and that fear will eat away your soul. These dementors are real, they exist among us today, their aim is to deprive you of your security, create chaos and wreak havoc!
Mumbai was rocked with blasts! Panic stricken people are now hiding in their houses in fear of these dementors, kids who have powerful weapons in their hands. They have no fear for their lives, their aim is to destroy, to taint the sanctity of the city, of our country. Their reasons are still unknown, their cause is yet undetermined, but what is certain is that they have penetrated into our lives with the surety of a knife plunged into a body and their goal is to leave behind pain and sorrow. It sounds dreadful, does it not? But it is true, that is exactly what they hope to accomplish. When we read children's novels, usually the villains are portrayed as different from humans as possible, it is because our subconscious will be unable to believe that a human can actually be that cruel. We can easily believe that a dementor is capable of converting a healthy individual into an empty shell, but a human destroying the soul of another sounds too horrendous to be true. I can still hardly believe it even after seeing firsthand exactly what man has become capable of! Even when we read about murderers and rapists, we classify them in a different category from all the other people that we know. Because I am unable to understand the mind of a person who is dedicated to destroy a thing of beauty, whether it is human being, or a building, or art, or a country. How can you burn down a beautiful building when you are not capable of constructing even ordinary one, when you are not capable of even visualizing an original architecture like that? How can you kill people who are doing their job, doing it well, doing it with creativity, with genuine love and joy? Each staff member in Taj who was killed, each police officer who was struck down, the son of a sweeper in G.T. Hospital who beheld the killing of his father, each individual harmed by this act of cowardice did not deserve it, they did no wrong. Goddamit, they were innocent men out to just earn a living! So how should I take this injustice towards my fellow brothers, how should I take this destruction of my city, how should I respect my government, how should I live to be happy once again?

FOOTLOOSE!!

This feeing comes over me quite a few number of times in my life, it makes a grand appearance just when my life starts assuming a routine pattern! The feeling just bubbles up within me and before I know it, I start exploring the different possible places I can pay a visit to on my day off! I usually get the Monday and Tuesday off every week, and I have been going to visit the different places in Belgaum over a couple of weeks every Monday. Though I did not go anywhere last week, I ended up doing quite a bit of gardening last Monday and that experience gave me a peaceful and pleasant feeling of euphoria! It was so invigorating to get my hands dirty in mud that was wet and fragrant from the slight drizzle that surprised us all last Monday! I thought of taking my usual trip to Belgaum today, but even that trip was taking on a familiar and boring shape and so I just chucked the plan.
So, the feeling persists. My mind flashes images of glorious sunsets on beaches, or a cozy cabin on the mountainside or even green fields that stretch for miles and appease my eyesight! And I long to travel to a new place, and have an adventure that will refresh my soul and rejuvenate my mind! I do not have any idea as to whom I have inherited this gypsylike trait from, it certainly has not come from my parents who are both homebodies! It just comes to me as naturally as one might feel hunger or thirst, and my mind reflexively starts exploring different avenues that might ultimately lead me towards an unforgettable experience. Ah! Just thinking of walking along nature in its form of unbridled beauty makes me want to break all the barriers and head out into the open spaces! God, I wish I could be a stallion just for a day, I would race the wind across the green mountainside and feel the adrenaline rush through my veins!!!
I could go on and on,..believe me! But I'll sign off here and wish you beautiful people out there a great week! Take care.

Drummer Boy

He has beautiful hands,the exact shade of dark mahogany, with long fingers whose tips are slightly rough(due to hours spent with the guitar) and shapely nails . And when I hold his hand in mine,I feel protected and secure and a strange kind of joy bubbles within me. His hand in mine evokes a feeling of fearlessness in me and I feel invincible. This feeling has been the saving grace in my trying times, for the warmth of his hands stays with me like the smell of the ocean that can never be forgotten. Those hands exude strength and I can spend hours tracing their contours and the distinctly visible veins that give them so much character.
But those hands are in character only when they are in violent motion, when they assume the responsibility of acting as the tools of a musician. Like the warrior who lives to hold a sword and take charge in battle, his hands were always meant to be strumming the strings of a guitar or beating a rhythm on the drums. For he, himself knows that it is his unspoken destiny to create music , to rejoice in the glory of knowing that he has the talent to compose a unique melody and to struggle and work to achieve the right to be a musician on a fulltime basis. But till then he continues to create one tune after another, be it in a cafe called Barista, or a Musician's mall or another music store called Furtados, or even at home, trying to drown out the expectations of the world with the resonating sounds of the guitar.
His passion is worth beholding, it is inspiring and I whenever i think of him,an image of him comes to my mind,it consists of him sitting with a guitar or the drums with complete concentration on his face and nothing but music on his mind. And when he has finally succeeded in building up a melody or a rhythm to his satisfaction, a dimpled smile crosses his face that has a glow bright enough to belittle the brightest star in the sky. Such is the beauty of observing a creative mind, a mind that has the capability of doing everything in a style that is original and exuberant.
And I miss that mind today,I miss those hands,I miss that smile, for till yesterday they were all by my side but now he is miles apart from me and all I have are memories to hold me till I meet him again. For I have realised that it is my unspoken destiny to walk alongside a musician with hands made from the purest mud, twinkling eyes dragged from the sky above, a smile dazzling enough to stop your heart and a mind that can keep you on your feet till you fall apart.

Free falling

We are all born with a sense of purpose, all of us announce our arrival into this world with a loud cry and a constant demand for attention. We were all once a bundle of curiosity, peering at faces and objects unknown to us with unbridled enthusiasm and we approached everything we had discovered with a joy and pride akin to the pride that Christopher Columbus must have displayed when he discovered the "New World", alike in the fact that we were also not the foremost discoverers.
Still, we managed to enthrall people and drown in their attentions by doing exactly the same things that millions of babies before us had done. Its the enthusiasm and childish innocence we displayed that gave our every action a magical quality to it and brought laughter to all those around us. We ventured forward like brave warriors out on a mission and tried valiantly to put one step in front of the other and once we succeeded, we were given rewards that would have befitted a king.
So, when did we lose that courage, that spark of independence that once prompted us out of our cradles onto the ground and then finally on our feet? When did we lose that glorious sense of delight that used to light up our eyes and fill us with a sense of wonderment at the mere sight of a butterfly? When did we grow up and why??
I feel sad when I think about today's youth. We have all been pushed around like puppets in a play, the only difference is that we feel those pushes, we feel the hurt. I am a happy girl today, working hard and trying to fulfill all my dreams, but I was just as confused a few months ago. I was reminded of that feeling today, when a young man who had just completed his Mechanical Engineering Degree came for an interview to our company. He wanted to shift from his mechanical background into an Electronics or Software background. His dilemma brought vividly to my mind the emotional trauma a young man/woman might go through when they are unsure about their career and their future life.
And there are too many students out there who are confused, who have a large burden of expectations on their shoulders which even Atlas would have found heavy to bear. So why can't we all be left loose? Why can't we all just be freed from all bonds of obligations that compel us towards a tedious life that gives neither satisfaction nor contentment?? It is a question all parents must ask themselves.
I can enumerate so many cases of students who are being forced into streams they don't have any interest in but they are sacrificing their free wills unconsciously to fulfill their obligations either towards parents or towards society. When did the world come to this? Do we truly want our future scientists, doctors and engineers to be apathetic towards their professions? Is it so important to have a child who has passed through one of the IIT's or AIM's rather than having a kid who is joyously and interestedly earning his living in an environment that he finds stimulating.
You cannot imagine how sad I feel when I look at a soul that should have been rejoicing in the glory of being born, in the glory of his ability to fulfill his dreams but instead is feeling the unmitigated sorrow of being bound in a train to a destination predetermined for him by others. That my dear friends is just not fair......
Our beautiful childhood should have been the launch pad to a carefree life where we would steer our own planes like valiant pilots into unchartered territories to write new chapters in history. Aim high dear friends, fly high, each one of us has obligations, but our foremost obligations lie towards ourselves. I love this song:

And then a hero comes along,
With the strength to carry on;
And you cast your fears aside,
And you know you can survive.

So when you feel like hope is gone,
Look inside you and be strong;
And you'll finally see the truth;
That a hero lies in you.

SMUG!!

If you could see my face right now, you would know the meaning of happiness. I am living and fulfilling a dream that has been so very important to me. Have you ever keenly observed a butterfly? A butterfly, whatever colour or shape it may be, is a beautiful creature who is always in a state of revelation, who flutters from flower to flower discovering something new at every instant. I feel like one such butterfly right now, discovering new facets of life and constantly learning about new subjects, from networking to electronics and even new languages, I cannot explain the feeling of euphoria I experience when I learn something on my own, or I devise a new idea or plan that has originated from the depths of my own mind. Today, I was to come up with an idea as to how to setup an experiment that would end up as an analogy to the working of a Cmos inverter. I had to use the apparatus of a water tank and pipes. I thought of an idea at first, and then tried to improve upon its drawbacks so that by the time I was done with it, it would be perfect, it would be a work of art. Devising that small experiment took up the time I usually invested in a walk, but my mind would not be satisfied till I had come up with a good plan. I discarded idea after idea till I came up with a setup that would suit the circuit perfectly. It was then that I realized the power of a human mind, I realized that every person has a mind that is capable of genuine creativity, if only every one of us expected the best from ourselves. I guess it is our expectations that ultimately decide our destiny. There is so much knowledge in the world and I am in the presence of people who expect the best from themselves here and there is nothing more exhilarating than knowing and believing that you can do whatever you set your mind to. There is nothing more fulfilling than wandering around in the hallways of science, examining and questioning different mysteries, many of them explored and explained by men, men who dared to question even the invisible lines of force that exist between charges. I admire these men but I am not awed by them anymore because they aren't as great as we have made them out to be. Yes, I dare to say that aloud. Every scientist you grew up learning about, every man whose name you read on the pages of your history book, every man you worshiped, every hero you idolized, they are not out of the world, they are not extraordinary. In fact they are normal men, they represent the common man, what is extraordinary is that we differentiate ourselves from them, we expect more from them then we do from ourselves. Why is that so? I agree that not all of us are blessed with intelligence but we all have some spark of creativity within us that is yours alone, and that spark cannot be dimmed by the sparkling glory of even the most brilliant mind. But the knowledge that is most important for every man is the knowledge of self awareness. There is nothing more important than understanding yourself, your every talent should have a pedestal, even though you are the only worshipper. Every quirky habit of yours has a sweet and unique taste, one that should be first understood and recognised by you. Your strengths and weaknesses are your own, embrace them and use them such that you are admired for your strengths and indulged and adored for your weaknesses. Wake up my friends, look within yourselves, you may find a scientist, or a writer, a leader, or a philosopher, or you may just find an individual happy to be himself, a butterfly enchanted by the world and delighted to just ponder upon the wonders in our lives.